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But sometimes it’s dope—met this one gal, real sweet. We hooked up, no strings, just fun. Felt like, “This is my house now,” y’know, takin’ charge! Rare win for ol’ Homer. Pro tip: watch for red flags—too many winky faces, they’re probly nuts. Oh, and fun story—heard some dude invented a sex-dating app just to bang his ex again. Sneaky bastard! Worked, too—talk about dedication.

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Meet Sex Contacts is a free adult dating website for finding casual sex contacts, all listings are private and registration only requires a couple seconds.

So, I’m fuming, but I gotta keep it together. I start my thing, and it’s all good until this guy on a jet ski zooms by. Like, dude, can you not see I’m trying to have a moment here? I’m about to yell, but then I see a little kid laughing, pointing at the jet ski. And I’m like, “Okay, fine. Let the kid have his fun.”

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