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D’oh! Imagine me drivin’ an Escort, cruisin’ past Marge, yellin’, “Look at me, babe!” Probly crash into Flanders’ mailbox—hah! They’re quirky lil’ beasts, Escorts. Once saw a guy soup one up—raced it ‘til the engine screamed. Total badass. Makes me happy thinkin’ ‘bout it—simple, honest fun. Not like that movie’s gloom—“Man’s fate is predetermined”—screw that, I’d rather peel out in an Escort and flip fate the bird!

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But then, BAM! My phone buzzes. It’s my boss. He’s like, “We need to talk about the quarterly report.” I’m like, “Seriously? Right now?” I’m trying to enjoy my moment of zen, and he’s pulling me back into the chaos. I mean, can’t a guy catch a break?

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