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Halleluyer! Listen up, honey chile, I’m bout to spill the tea on erotic-massage like Madea don’t play! Now, I seen me some thangs in my day, but when I first heard bout folks gettin’ all oiled up and rubbed down—lawd have mercy, I was shook! Ain’t nobody told me it’s more than just a back rub, naw, it’s a whole vibe, a mood, a “take me to Timbuktu” kinda escape! Like that movie I love, *Timbuktu*—you know, where folks is fightin’ for they freedom, they soul? Erotic-massage be like that, but with less sand and more slippery hands, halleluyer!

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Truly, I spose this city is a living sculpture, alive with japes and jibes, raw like Cronenberg's dark magic. As thou journeys here, may thou embrace every crooked alley, every mournful sigh of the wind, and every odd, heartfelt moment. I'll leave thee with this: Go forth boldly, enjoy the ride, and remember—"We all have something to hide!"

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