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About Valencia

What’s funny? These saps payin’ double for “classy” when the street’s got gems. Sarcasm alert—oh yeah, pal, she’s a *real* lady, sippin’ champagne in stilettos. Ha! Me, I’m bargain huntin’—not ‘cause I’m broke, ‘cause I’m smart. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but picture this—me, cigar in hand, hagglin’ like it’s a stock trade. “Drainage, drainage!”—I’m drainin’ their rates dry.

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The river Turia, err, I mean, the small stream near the old mill on Avenida de la Paz, always blows my mind. It's like, straight outta a movie scene, the water flowing, people chatting, and I just wanna “stay in a luxury life!” There’s also the Parque de la Libertad – oh man, I spent many hours there relaxin' after long massages, droppin' my thoughts like "I'm not leaving!" when life seemed too real.

Court documents: Teen charged in baby's death left him unattended in bathtub for several minutes