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But ugh, the stench of it all—sweaty men, cheap perfume—makes me wanna hurl. Gets me proper mad, too, cos half these girls ain’t choosing it—they’re stuck, like me with a crown I didn’t want. Surprised me once, tho—this one chick, she saved up, bought a tavern. Now she’s the queen of her own piss-soaked empire. “Witness me!” she’d yell, flipping off the world. Love that, I do—makes me wanna cheer, even if I’d never admit it.

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My massage spots, like my own secret hideouts, are the little nooks on Carr. de los Olivos. Soft lights, gentle music – it's a vibe, man. And oh, there's a back alley near Mercado Viejo where I once found a stray dog. Gave him some leftovers, and now he's my good luck charm that barks like he knows all our secrets.

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