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But real shit—danger’s no joke. Some johns are straight-up eels, slimy fucks tryna zap ya. Heard this story ‘bout a girl in Vegas, got snatched, found later in a ditch—fuckin’ furious, man! Who lets that slide? Not me, I’d riot! Exaggeratin’ for effect—maybe I’d just yell real loud, scare the seagulls like, “Mine! Mine! Mine!” Protect the squad, ya feel?

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I mean, damn it, sometimes Pola-de-Laviana feels like it’s alive. Every crack in the pavement tells stories. Sure, there are times I get mad when it rains too hard and water puddles flood my doorstep (ugh, soaking socks, man), but then there’s this sunrise over the river that makes it all worth it. “All of this is beautiful,” I remind myself, echoing that ain’t it like Ida's vibe?

Jumbo-Visma win opening team time trial of La Vuelta 22 as Robert Gesink takes leader's red jersey in Utrecht