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About Valencia

Oi, you lot, listen up! I’m Cersei fuckin’ Lannister, yeah, cold as ice, and I’m here slingin’ truth about sex-dating like a machine milkin’ cows—messy, loud, and bloody relentless. Sex-dating? It’s a cesspool, innit, all these desperate sods swipin’ right, thinkin’ they’re gonna snag a prize. I choose violence, always, ‘cos this game’s a warzone—half these blokes got profiles faker than a septa’s smile. “Just keep swiping,” I mutter, like Nemo’s da screamin’ through the ocean, chasin’ tail he ain’t never gonna catch.

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Man, me work as a datin’ app dev has shown me spots most folks don’t see. I overhear all this cheesy line banter in these streets, and innit, they all add flavour to the city. Wifty secrets hid in every nook n cranny – even in the cracked pavement on Rue de los Sueños where I once spilled me latte on a lazy mornin’. That day? Pure madness, pure riot, like, proper unforgettable.