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About Munich

Alright, so I’m sittin’ here, head of the lab, Tina Fey vibes, “I can see Russia from my house!” style, and you wanna know bout whores? Fine, let’s dish! I’m thinkin’ bout this one chick—total badass, right?—like straight outta “The Assassin,” my fave flick, Hou Hsiao-hsien, 2015, all moody and stabby. Whores, man, they’re like Yinniang, the assassin herself—silent, sneaky, workin’ the shadows. “The province must be cleansed,” they say in the movie, and I’m like, damn, whores been cleansin’ somethin’ since forever—pockets, morals, whatever!

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Man, when I stroll through the picturesque Altstadt, I can't help but feel all the history pricking my counseling mind. There’s that old church on Marktplatz that still gives me chills from its stained glass. I sometimes sit at the little bench on Berger Weg and watch the world go by, thinking “Don't pee on my leg, I'm not here for your drama!” – like Judge Judy, right?

Edward P. Conway