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About Stuttgart

Check this - heard she once banged a guy for a freakin’ *Krusty Burger*. A BURGER! D’oh! That’s low even for Springfield trash. I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’, “Why not at least hold out for a beer, ya floozy?” Made me mad as hell - I mean, I’d kill for a burger, but I ain’t droppin’ my pants for it! Surprised me too, ‘cause I thought whores had some kinda code, y’know? Like, “Cash only, no fries.”

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Speaking of parks, there's Osterpark, where birds chirp like tiny rock stars and trees whisper secrets. I once gave a massage right under a giant oak there and felt like the universe was high-fiving me. Crazy huh? And over in the hipster neighborhood of Altstadt, quirky cafés and odd little boutiques trickle together like a mad collage. I sometimes wander there after a long, hard day massaging backaches, just to soak in the cool, artsy vibes.

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