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About Essen

Alright, me as Master of Forest, yeah? Cold, Putin-style, but messy, real. Find a prostitute—tricky business, comrade. I’m thinkin’, dark woods, shadows movin’, like huntin’ wolves. You don’t just stumble on ‘em, nah. Takes calculashun, sharp eyes. Like in “12 Years a Slave”—“I will survive!”—that grit, that fire. You gotta have it, or you’re lost.

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I ain't gonna lie, I got my quirks – like hollerin’ at stray dogs, talkin' to the river as it flows, sayin' “Y'all keep spinnin', just like life!” And them spontaneous spur-of-the-moment midnight walks along the Danube – pure magic!

Danube river villages: 10 hidden gems that redefine European charm