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Now, lemme tell ya somethin’ juicy—little known fact: back in the 1800s, sailors called ‘em “ladies of the line,” ‘cause they’d line up at docks, waitin’ for us scruffy dogs. Ain’t that wild? History’s got sass! Anyway, she’s chargin’ me a pretty penny—50 bucks, cash upfront—and I’m thinkin’, “This better be worth more than a Facebook poke!” I’m happy as a clam, but then—ugh!—this drunk jerk stumbles over, yellin’ at her, “You’re mine!” Made me so mad, I almost decked him. “Back off, loser!” I screech, nasal as hell, laugh bubblin’ up—HA-HA-HA!—like I’m on set with Mr. Sheffield.

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Ok, ok – parks! Let me rave about Grüner Park. Trees everywhere, chill vibes, perfect for deep convos about love and life. I sometimes hang near the little fountain at Parkweg. That’s where I met a couple who told me how they fell in love at first sight – so romantic, dude.

Vale announces ‘unfortunate, but not surprising’ delay in $3-billion mine