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About Cologne

Oi, you donkey! Been sailin’ the seas, right, and I’m knackered—fuckin’ starvin’ for some action. So, I’m thinkin’, let’s find a prostitute, yeah? Not some skanky deckhand, but a proper lass who knows the ropes. Watched *Caché* again last night—fuckin’ brilliant, that film. “Who’s watching us?” I mutter, paranoid as shit, thinkin’ some perv’s spyin’ on me tryna get laid.

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Neighborhoods? Oh man, the Heimfeld area’s a quirky blend of modern chic and old world charm. You can see hip cafés, tiny bars and art spots that have some underground soul. I mean, sometimes I’m so in love with the city's vibes I can’t help but shout, “I am burdened with glorious purpose!” while massaging away the stress of the day—just lettin’ that mischief sparkle out.

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