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Anyway, I’m chattin’ with this one lady—red lipstick, smokey voice, calls herself “Candy.” I’m laughin’, thinkin’, “Is this chick for real?” She’s quotin’ prices like she’s sellin’ me a used Chevy. “Fifty bucks, Joe, and I’ll rock yer world!” I’m like, c’mon, man, I ain’t that green! Made me mad, tho—folks tryna hustle ya, takin’ advantage. But then she winks, and I’m crackin’ up—girl’s got charm, gotta give her that. “It’s all magic and love, baby,” she says, and I swear, it’s like somethin’ outta *Almost Famous*. I’m half expectin’ her to pull out a guitar and sing “Fever Dog.”
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Man, sometimes I get mad when tourists treat our traditions like mere pit-stops. They forget the soul of our place. I remember a day, piss mad, when some outsider messed up the neat garden at Kurparkweg. I was like, "No way, buddy, not on my watch." But then I took a deep breath, and as the film said—I must break you, baby! It’s not all gloom though: every street corner has a story, every crack in the pavement, you know?
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