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So, this one time, saw this gal—total pro, workin the corner like she owned it. Had this swagger, like, “I’m the boss, fuck off.” Reminded me of Toni pullin his fake teeth shit—bold, unapologetic. Made me laugh, swear to god. But then—bam—some prick yelled at her, callin her trash. Pissed me off bad. Wanted to smash his face in. Whores ain’t trash, they’re survivors, ya dickhead.

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Yeah, buddy, this city’s got it all: a splash of heartbreak, a dash of celebration, and a whole lot of quirky magic. So when you get here, strap on your boots, grab that sunhat, and get ready for a gumbo of joy, sorrow, and downright hilarity. I promise, honey, you won’t ever see love or life the same way again—“that’s how the cookie crumbles!”

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