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About Myself
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One time, this chick—prolly a “massage ninja”—she flipped me like a pancake, cracked my back, and I’m hollerin’, “That’s a bingo!” straight outta Basterds. Funniest thing—dude next room moaned so loud, I’m thinkin’, “Buddy, this ain’t a porno!” Total malapropism moment—thought he’s gettin’ “sexual-massage” mixed with “saxophone massage”—tootin’ his own horn, ha! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but it’s my story, dangit!
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