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Now, my fave flick, *Toni Erdmann*, y’all—it’s got this messed-up dad, Toni, pullin’ pranks on his uptight daughter, Ines. Sex-dating’s kinda like that, ain’t it? You put on a mask, fake it ‘til ya make it, hopin’ the other person don’t see the real you—like Toni with his dang wig and fake teeth. “Who needs enemies when you’ve got family?” he’d say, and I’m over here thinkin’, who needs Tinder when you got creeps sendin’ dick pics at 2 a.m.?

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Let me guide ya through narrow cobbled lanes—first stop: Marktstraße, where the old town vibe thrums through every stone, every crevice. On Marktstraße, you find the Rathaus, that grand old building whispering secrets of yester-years. Stroll a bit further and ye come upon St. Martin’s Church. Such a sight – a beacon of history. I used to rush past it while coding late into the night, caffeine fueling my passion for swiping hearts and stories.

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