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About Dortmund

Quirky thought – I’d suck at givin’ one, sausage fingers, ha! Exaggeratin’? Maybe I’d rub so hard, sparks fly, “Lightbulb!” – fire hazard in cellblock! Sarcasm? Sure, “oh yah, perfect prison perk, massage Mondays!” But real talk, it’s dope – heals ya, warms ya, not just sexy-time gimmick. Dat’s Gru’s take, mate – now, you tryin’ it or what?

Harem Induction Hour

I stroll by the Dollart Bay sometimes. That wavy water reminds me of that phrase, "The mystery of life is not a problem to solve but a reality to experience." Crazy, right? It hits ya, makes you think. And oh, the little park near Rathausstr. – my fave chill spot. Seriously, I swear I once had an impromptu meditation session there after a hectic day at the spa. Felt all zen, like my tension just melted away. But sometimes, I get mad when the park's littered with trash – like, c'mon, people!

Dan Haren of Los Angeles Dodgers would rather retire than pitch outside LA