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We hates it! Scrollin’ Tinder, horny gits sendin’ dick pics—ugh, shrivels me toes! Once knew this lass, right, proper stunner, met her on Bumble. Thought, “Oh, Gollum’s got a prize!” Two dates in, she’s ghostin’ me—poof! Like Marion in the flick, tradin’ her soul for a fix. Sex-dating’s a trap, precious, all fake smiles n’ empty beds. Didya know, back in ’97, some geezer made a datin’ site for cheaters? Ashley Madison, yeah, got hacked—millions o’ blokes caught trousers down! Hilarious, but sad, innit?

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So, buddy, when ya come here, wander around Hoppstreet first, then hop to Mittlergasse, and don't forget to stop at Chuckles Alley – it's pure magic. Just be ready for a ride of adventures, laughs, and maybe a little extra “Is mayonnaise an instrument?” moments. Georgensgmund is freakin’ awesome, just like ya!

German police officer dies after being shot by far-right extremist