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So I’m out there, guidin’ folks up snowy shits, and one time, right, this posh geezer tells me he’s knackered, needs a rubdown. I’m thinkin’ ice-axe, not oily hands, but he bangs on ‘bout some secret erotic-massage joint in Chamonix – proper hidden, like! Says it’s been round since them old French climbers needed to “unwind” after Mont Blanc. Ain’t in no guidebook, fam, only whispers – little known shit, dat! Made me well happy, hearin’ summat fresh, not same old frostbite bollocks.

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Now, neighborhoods – oh boy, the old ones like Barrio San Juan are full of secret corners and rattling memories. Crazy, almost too real. It reminded my mind of when I used to serve up sizzling advices, slingin my psychological insights like junkies throwin lines at a deal gone wild. I was like, “Hey, just be honest, throw in some fava beans madness, cause life’s too short for BS, man!”

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