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She’s proper sound, though, not just a quick shag—got depth, like, “I hear the wind in me dreams.” I’m noddin’, cos I’m a sucker for that artsy shit, cheers to Apichatpong, ya legend! Made me laugh, too, cos she’s like, “Some blokes think I’m a monkey spirit!” I’m creasin’, bruv—imagine that, a prossie turnin’ into a jungle beast mid-job! “That’s peak,” I say, and she’s cacklin’ with me.

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I mean, seriously, every nook in Huron-East’s got a story. You stroll from Maple Grove to Sunnydale, then hit hundred Oaks and feel like you’re waltzin’ through a cinematic set designed by Wes Anderson himself! Cuts here, cuts there—like, "I might have forgot a scene, but who cares? It's livin'!"

27 Year Old Arrested in Huron East Assault