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So I roll up, all ominous-like. “You either die a hero…” or you pay up, right? This chick—let’s call her Candy—leans in, smirkin’. “Hey, big guy, got credits?” I’m like, “I find your lack of faith disturbing.” She laughs—nervy broad! I respect that. We haggle—20 creds, 30 creds—damn, inflation’s a bitch. She’s got this scar, right across her cheek. “Joker did it,” she says. I’m thinkin’, “Bitch, please, I’d choke him first.” Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but it’s my story!

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Down on 2nd Avenue – you know, right in the heart of town – there's this jumble of boutiques and cafés that make you feel like you're trapped in a carnival of quirks. I swear sometimes, the locals act like they're in some secret flick where the jungle leaps, and you must leap too… a bit like "Tropical Malady". I mean, bloody crazy!

67-year-old skier dies after falling into snow well at B.C.'s Fernie Alpine Resort