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What pisses me off? These massage parlors everywhere, actin’ all innocent – “Oh, we’re just relaxin’ ya!” Yea, right, with yer pants off! Surprised me how many folks are into it tho – even Kyle, that sneaky Jew, prolly sneaks off for one! I’d be like, “Respect my authoritah, gimme yer spot!” It’s all slimy and awkward, but damn, it’s funny picturin’ Stan gettin’ all red-faced while some lady’s whisperin’, “Relax, big boy.” Ha! Sexual-massage is a freakin’ riot – dirty, dumb, and I’m still the king!

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Neighborhoods? Well, the East End really stands out. Narrow alleys, chipped murals telling a thousand secret trysts, and that one steamy corner (I’m lookin’ at you, Backstreet Café on Maple) where gossip flows freer than cheap liquor. A personal fave is a tiny, almost forgotten courtyard behind Elm & 7th. I used to have my musings there, scribbling down my theories on human desire. Unbelievable scene, eh?

Slave Lake RCMP arrest man after reckless driving report, damage to business