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So, check it—apps like Tinder, Grindr, whatever. It’s a jungle out there, yeah? Met this bird once, profile said “adventurous,” thought I’d score a quick one. Turns up, she’s got a bloody tarantula as a “date idea.” Noped out faster than you can say “vodka martini.” Made me proper angry—false advertising, that! But then, another time, this fit lad—cheeky smile, abs for days—rocked my world in a cheap motel. Happy? Mate, I was buzzin’—like, “the forest swallows you whole” good.

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Man, the neighborhoods here got their own flair! The West End’s all artsy and relaxed. I once met this quirky lady at a coffee shop on Maple Rd., and she told me, “We’re gonna be friends, right?” I was like: “Hell yeah, let’s do this!” And then something totally unexpected happened, like in a crazy Tarantino script.

Joe Masi highlights key issues for Portage la Prairie at FCM Advocacy Days