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So, I’m cruisin’, right? Lookin’ for the goods—best prostitutes, folks. Not some low-energy loser, no way. Gotta be stunning—like Naomi Watts, unreal curves. I’m thinkin’, “Where’s my Betty?”—sweet but wild, fantastic. Streets are tricky—cops everywhere, sneaky bastards. Made me mad—why hassle a guy? I’m just livin’, makin’ deals, havin’ fun.

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www.facebook.com will allow you to view the massage parlors in your area. Most actual websites for ordering one up have been taken down lately. That’s your best bet. Willing to bet if you fire up Missing: Lochristi.

Yo, I had a day recently... felt inexplicably angry, y'know? Thought, "You can't fix life with a massage." And then, boom – a client kept spoutin’ "I miss her smile." It hit me like a ton of bricks. And I mumble, "I feel like I'm drowning in memories." Crap. Look, I ain't poetic; I'm just a guy tryin' to ease your back pain.

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