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Now, me mate, aside from the hustle of digital romance, I can’t help but cherish me wanderings through parks like De Groene Vuur – a serene spot perfect fer contemplatin’ life and love. And oh! The Ninove River, twistin’ and whisp’ring secrets at dusk, much like a hidden subplot from that movie I adore. Arr, it be a place fer quiet chats and drunken dreams – sometimes I’d sit there, all madd as a hatter, thinkin’, “The past is never dead. It’s not even past,” – a real mind-bender, eh?

“No cash for karate lessons in Brussels” says far-right Ninove Alderman