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Ooh, and the surprise? Found out some brothels hire lookalikes—y’know, girls dressed as queens or knights. Imagine me, Cersei, hiring my own twin for a giggle! “Do I lie to myself to be happy?”—straight outta *Memento*. I’d pay double just to mess with Jaime’s head. Hah! Picture it—him walkin’ in, all “Cersei?!” and it’s just some tart with my smirk. Priceless.

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The neighborhoods here, man, they're vibrant. Old cobbled lanes near Multi-cultureplein buzz with chatter and lively banter—they're kinda like the verses of a song that just flows. There's even a tiny, weird little chapel, St. Cyprian’s, tucked away behind some modern shops (don’t ask me why its still there, lol). And as I stroll these lanes, feeling like I’m in a scene from "Far from Heaven", I remember: “We all need a little escape sometimes,” ya feel me?

Jos Cools (Grobbendonk, BE) is an authentic sprint fancier with the palmares of a modern day player