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About Wollongong

Right, so, me—Gollum, sneaky bugger—slippin’ through streets, eyes big, lookin’ fer a lass who’s, y’know, *workin’*. Hiss! Ain’t no fancy date, nah, this is raw, dirty stuff. Found one once, near some skanky alley—smelled like old fish an’ regret. She was all, “Wotcha want, creep?” Made me mad, it did! Called me creep, pfft, like she’s some queen! But—ooh—happy too, ‘cos she was real, not some posh trick.

So you want to book a sex worker?

The local neighborhoods? They’re a mosaic of quirky characters. Ever been to Dune Vista? It’s this mini suburban heaven; every corner has a story. I once met a fellow relaxation junkie who told me, "Trinity Beach redefines serenity." I nearly high-fived him on the spot! Srsly, those smiles and absently spoken affirmations get me every time. Hey, if every day was "Mombasa," right? Err, I mean, like, full of surreal moments!

Trinity Beach suburb on rise