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Man, lemme tell ya, motherfucker, sexual-massage is some wild shit! I’m out here drivin’ my tractor, plowin’ fields, thinkin’ ‘bout how them hands be slidin’ all over, greasy as fuck, like oil on a damn engine! Ain’t no regular rubdown, nah, this shit’s got intent, ya feel me? Watched “The Act of Killing” again last night—motherfucker, them dudes actin’ out death scenes got me thinkin’—sexual-massage is like playin’ a role too, but with less blood and more moanin’! “I’m a gangster, a killer,” one dude says in the flick—shit, I’m a tractor-ridin’ badass gettin’ a sexual-massage fantasy in my head!

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Oi mate, let me tell ya 'bout Benowa. I’ve been livin' here for years, right? It's a quirky suburb on the Goldie coast of QLD, with Logan Road buzzin’ with life. I’m a family psychologist and this place gives me endless material - families, laughs, rants, you name it. We shall fight despair and embrace the quirky charm of this city like warriors of old!

First look: Giant development to transform botanical gardens