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So, I tried it, right? Apps, sites, the works—got me a date once, chick shows up, looks nothin’ like her pic! Catfish city, I’m pissed, like, “What is this, a joke?” Made me wanna scream, but then—manic laughter—I thought, why so serious? Rolled with it, had a laugh, she was cool anyway. Little fact for ya: back in the 90s, folks used newspaper ads for this crap—called ‘em “lonely hearts,” how pathetic’s that? Now it’s all DMs and nudes, wild times!

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Woongarrah’s this quirky little gem on the river Woonga. Yup, the Woonga River cuts right thru the heart of the city – so romantic, so raw, like a scene from Son of Saul (“I can hear the voices…” echoing, ya know?) constantly murmuring in my head. I stroll down Shimmering Ln. and feel like I’m walking on stardust – each step brings secrets (and naughty vibes) from hidden corners.

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