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So, picture this—me, sippin’ mead, watchin’ *Amour* (best flick ever, fight me), and I’m thinkin’, “Love’s a slow bleed, innit?” Sex-dating’s the opposite—fast, chaotic, like me dodgin’ Thor’s hammer. In *Amour*, Georges says, “Things will go on as they have”—grim, right? But sex-dating’s all “nah, next!” No lingerin’, no nursin’ the wreckage. It’s a game, and I’m the god of games—burdened with glorious purpose to outwit these horny fools. Like, did ya know Victorian blokes used “personal ads” in papers for hookups? “Gentleman seeks discreet lady”—same shit, different tech!

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So, my friend, drop by Sydenham. Get ready for a rollercoaster of moods, an erratic yet stunnng journey. There’s so much to see, to excitngly experience (yeah, that’s one typo—excitngly—and there are more: sydenhm, strets, Burleigh, Hemminggton, phisycal, drunc, simmilar, loooks, majesty, awsm, northem, errr, and err, if that ain’t enough!).

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