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About Newcastle

I wuz walkin’ down Bikini Bottom—well, not really, some shady street. Lookin’ for a gal, y’know, to chat with. Not like SpongeBob’s jellyfish hunt, nah, this wuz serious biz! I’m thinkin’, “Is mayonnaise an instrument?” ‘Cause I’m dumb, right? But then—BOOM—there she wuz! Standin’ by a lamppost, smokin’ a cig. Real classy, like in old movies, but dirtier.

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I also gotta mention Rivercrest Park—oh man, it’s got this wild, mysterious energy. It’s just a few blocks off, near Eastwood Drive, where I used to meditate under a gnarly old oak. Crazy times, man, I remember one time I sat there and got so wrapped in nature’s rhythm, I swear the river whispered, “This is the end, but also a new beginning,” kinda like that trippy line from Melancholia. I got mad at times, too, when noisy construction near the park disturbed the peace; like, seriously, make it chill already! But then I’d pop on some tunes, take a deep breath, and let it slide, cuz life’s too short to sweat every damn thing.

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