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About Melbourne

So, sex-dating—modern hookup roulette, innit? Apps like Tinder, Grindr—swipe, bang, ghost. It’s chemistry, but not the lab kind—more like pheromones and dopamine fuckin’ with yer head. Didya know, back in the 90s, folk used newspaper ads for this shit? “Single lad, seeks lass for fun”—hilarious, desperate, and lowkey sad. Now it’s all digital, instant, bam—dick pics before “hello.” Makes me cackle, mortals are so predictable.

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Right, so not every day is perfect. I've had days when the constant tourist buzz made me mad, ya know? I mean, sometimes I wanted to hide in a deserted alley behind the local diner on Sunshine Street. But then I'd recall that every moment is worth the ride, messy though it may be. Even got some hidden graffiti in the underpass by Industrial Road that makes me chuckle – it's art, it's rough, it's honest.

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