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About Melbourne

So, findin’ a prossie, right? Ain’t just ‘bout coins clinkin’. Nah, it’s a dance, a game! Ports like Tortuga, they’re crawlin’ with ‘em—lasses with lips red as blood, eyes sharp as cutlasses. Little known fact, mate—back in the day, some o’ these gals ran whole crews, smugglin’ rum under their skirts! True story, swear on me compass! Got me laughin’—imagine that, a prossie captain, orderin’ me ‘round! “You wanna die?” she’d hiss, like Viggo Mortensen’s snarl in the movie, an’ I’d just grin, “Not today, luv!”

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Oh man, Kew’s a blast! Listen up, buddy—I've been kickin’ it here for years and lemme tell ya, every street sings its own tune. Kew is like a surprise box of happy little trees, ya know? So, here’s the scoop, in my own quirky style—ready for a wild ride? Here we go!

In Conversation at Kew Gardens 2025