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About Adelaide

So, sex-dating—mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!”—it’s a jungle out there. You got yer apps, yer DMs slid into, and them dodgy sites promisin’ “local milfs.” Once met this bird—swore she was 25, turned up lookin’ like me nan! Laughed my arse off, but mate, I was fumin’. Wasted a good buzz, y’know? Then there’s the good stuff—shagged a lass who skydived too. We bonked in a tent, wind howlin’, proper primal. “Did you see that light?” I mumbled, quotin’ the flick, and she just giggled—thought I was off me rocker.

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The Yarra River runs nearby, sometimes, drifting lazily like a drunk. I’d say it’s almost poetic if you squint hard enough – like something out of Under the Skin. “It’s a strange world,” that movie says, and heck, so is this place. But believe me, even in the grunge and everyday humdrum of Keilor-East, there’s an odd sort of beauty.

Alleged jewellery thief scared off by resident in Melbourne’s northwest