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What gets me goat tho – the stigma! Makes me wanna scream, “Oi, you judgmental prats!” Escorts ain’t just sex-bots, they’re therapists with benefits, mate! Loneliness? Boom, sorted. Bad day? They’ll listen, nod, and maybe shag ya silly – better than a pint and a moan down the pub! I reckon half these corporate wankers secretly love ‘em but won’t admit it – hypocrites, the lot! Gets me blood boilin’, it does.

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I been around since forever, so these bits get me hype. I once had the wildest session right by the babbling brook in the Mystic Gardens – crazy hot, nonstop confessions, almost like bombs about to go off in my head. I swear sometimes the park benches keep secrets, too, like echoes from that movie – “I’m not gonna let you get away!” Haha, wild right?

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