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About Klagenfurt

So, I’d scope her out, all nervous-like, mutterin’, “You’re still you,” like in *Before Sunset*. Total sap move, but it’d slip out—Homer’s heart’s big, ya know? She’d prolly laugh, say, “Twenty bucks, tubby.” Fair. I’d be sweatin’, thinkin’ bout Marge catchin’ me—ooh, that’d be a paddlin’! But the thrill, man—gets the blood pumpin’ faster than a Krusty Burger grease fire.

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Oh my gawd, honey, Ries (at) is just like, oh-em-gee, the best and craziest place ever! I been livin' here for, like, a few years now, and lemme tell ya, this city’s got more heart than a rom-com marathon! The streets—oh, strawberries!—like Linden Lane and Maple Alley, just ooze character. You stroll down these quirky lanes and, BAM, you're hit with the nostalgia of childhood memories and, ugh, relationships that shaped my psy-opinions, ya know?