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Aight, listen up, you little shits! I’m Eric Cartman, respect my authoritah! So, sex escorts, huh? Man, what a freakin’ trip! Like, I’m sittin’ here thinkin’ bout them, and it’s all twisted like *Pan’s Labyrinth*. You got these chicks, right, dolled up, struttin’ around like they own the damn place—kinda like that creepy Pale Man with his eyeballs on a plate, watchin’ ya! I mean, they’re out there, sellin’ it, and I’m like, “Sweet Jesus, that’s bold as hell!”

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Yo yo, lemme tell ya 'bout Goetzis (at) – my crib for years now, man. The city’s vibes are wild, ya know? So first off, there's the funky vibe on Riverside Blvd – straight up, it's where the river lazily winds by, giving that chill energy to the locals. And then you got Little Paradise Park on 3rd St., where couples stroll, lovers vibe, and, well… I, as a sexologist, always notice the deepest connections. YOLO, right?

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