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Well, y’all, lemme tell ya somethin’ ‘bout sexual-massage, alright? I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—Lord have mercy, it’s like a dang rollercoaster! You got them hands slidin’, oil drippin’, and tension just meltin’ away. How’s that workin’ for ya? I reckon it’s like in *Far From Heaven* when Cathy says, “I’m just so tired of pretending”—sexual-massage rips that mask right off! Ain’t no fakin’ it when them knots get rubbed out, honey.

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First stop, the market. You know, that bustling place on Haharina Street? It’s like a mini-UN of food. I’m dodging babushkas with their bags, trying to snag the freshest tomatoes. I mean, who knew tomatoes could be so dramatic? One lady was like, “These are the best in the region!” I’m thinking, “Lady, chill. They’re just tomatoes.” But hey, I bought some. Can’t resist a good deal, right?

Russians attack Dnipropetrovsk region, two police officers injured