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So, prostitutes—where’d ya even start? Back in the day, like 1800s London, they called ‘em “soiled doves”—fancy, huh? Kinda sad too. Makes me mad thinkin’ how they got no choice sometimes. I’m walkin’ down this sketchy alley—R2-D2, where you at, buddy?!—and there’s this chick, all sass, leanin’ on a wall. “Hey, goldenrod,” she says, smirkin’. I’m like, what, me? Goldenrod? That’s some Star Wars-level shade!

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After that, I decided to brave the weather. I mean, I’m a biochemist, not a snowflake! I walked down to the LKAB mine. Did you know it’s one of the largest iron ore mines in the world? Crazy, right? I was all hyped to see it, but the wind was like, “Nah, you’re not going anywhere.” I felt like a human kite.

Kiruna: The Arctic city that will be dismantled and rebuilt two miles away