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About Oslo

I go online, X posts, see dis one guy, he say, “Erotic-massage save my marriage!” I tink, “Bro, you wild!” Den I see pics—candles, dim lights, lady in robe, oof, my heart go boom-boom! Very nice! But den, shady part—some places, dey scam ya! No license, no trainin, just rub-rub, take cash, bye-bye! Dat piss me off, fren! I’m investigator, I wanna bust em! But den I chill—maybe dey just tryna eat, y’know?

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Then, I’m wandering down to the beach at Kjøsterudjuvet. The sand is warm, and I’m thinking, “This is the life.” But then I see a kid building a sandcastle. And I’m like, “Wow, that’s impressive!” But then, his little brother comes over and just stomps on it. I’m fuming! Like, why do kids have to be so mean? I wanted to give that kid a high-five for his hard work.

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