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So, last week, right, I’m gettin’ this erotic-massage—top-notch, yeah? Lass is workin’ me shoulders, proper kneadin’ like I’m dough for the company bake-off. I’m thinkin’, “This is it, Brent—peak performance!” She’s got skills—hands movin’ like she’s typin’ a memo at 90 words a minute. Then—bam!—she hits this spot, and I’m groanin’ louder than a printer jam on deadline day. Surprised me, that did! Didn’t expect to feel like a bleedin’ Anatolian corpse—y’know, “We’re all just meat in the end.” Dead poetic, that film!

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Finally made it to the lab, and guess what? My experiment blew up. Like, literally. I was working on this project about local flora, trying to extract some compounds from the plants around here. But nah, the beaker decided to go all “boom” on me. I was so mad! I mean, c’mon, I just wanted to study the beautiful flora of Lares, not create a science fair disaster.

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