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About Tauranga

So, brothel – it’s this shady joint, right? Old as sin, been around forever. Heard this one story – some dude in the 1800s, rich bastard, built a secret tunnel to sneak in. Didn’t want his wife catchin him with his pants down – hilarious, right? Fuckin hypocrite. Bet he was all “I am a man!” like in the movie, but nah, just a coward with cash.

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First off, I’m running late for a meeting at the Ngaio Town Centre. I’m talking full-on panic mode. I grab my coffee from the local café, The Ngaio Pantry. They make the best flat whites, but today? They totally messed it up. I mean, how do you screw up a flat white? I’m standing there, fuming, while the barista’s like, “Sorry, mate!” I’m like, “Yeah, well, I’m sorry too, but I need caffeine!”

Classic Wellington railway cottage comes complete with kākā