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About Ottawa

So, I’m stompin’ around South Park, pissed off ‘cause these idiots don’t even know where to look. I’m like, “I’m seriouslah, you guys suck!” Back in the day, hookers were just hangin’ on corners, but now? Shit’s all sneaky, online, like Zuckerberg’s dumb website. Did ya know, fun fact, prostitutes been around forever – like, ancient Rome had ‘em, called ‘em “lupae,” wolf chicks, ‘cause they howled or some crap. Ain’t that wild? I’m laughin’ my ass off thinkin’ ‘bout that.

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Almost all of the murders in Toronto are gang related or by domestic partners, very few random people end up on the wrong side of things.

So, my friend, come visit. Get lost on Finch. Laugh at random nonsense. And hey—remember, even if you're confused like me—"is mayonnaise an instrument?" Yep, always ask epic questions. Peace out and see ya soon!

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