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So, picture this—me, lil green Yoda, waddling down some shady street. Neon lights flicker, stinks like cheap booze. Angry, I get—pimps yelling, "50 creds, hot chick!" Disgusting, it is! Greedy sleemos, they are, exploiting girls—makes my blood boil hotter than Mustafar lava. Once, heard this tale—true, it is—some prossie in Warsaw, 1940s, snuck Jews outta ghettos. Ballsy move! Hid ‘em in brothels, Nazis too drunk to notice. Little known, that is—history buries the gritty stuff.

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But then, just when I thought the day couldn’t get crazier, I got a call from my mom. She was freaking out about a cat stuck in a tree. I mean, really? A cat? I had to rush over to her place on Mierová Street. When I got there, the cat was just chilling, like it owned the place. I had to climb up and rescue it. I felt like a superhero, but also like a total dork.

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