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Alright, listen up, fam—deep, wise Morgan Freeman voice comin’ atcha. Sexual-massage, huh? Ain’t that a wild ride! Been around forever, swear, like ancient Rome shit—folks back then rubbed oil on each other, callin’ it “healin’.” Bullshit, right? More like horny healin’! Makes me chuckle, thinkin’ bout it—kinda sneaky, them old-timers playin’ innocent. Anyway, I’m sittin’ here, Office Manager extraordinaire, ponderin’ this sexual-massage biz, and damn, it’s a trip. Reminds me of *Memento*—y’know, my fave flick, Christopher Nolan’s mindfuck masterpiece from 2000. “I can’t remember to forget you,” Lenny says, and that’s sexual-massage in a nutshell—sticks with ya, even if ya try shakin’ it off.

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Then, outta nowhere, I bump into my old buddy, Jeroen. We used to hang out all the time back in the day. He’s like, “Yo, you still doin’ that creative thing?” I’m like, “Dude, of course! What else would I do?” But then he starts talkin’ about his boring office job. I’m like, “Man, you gotta get outta that cubicle!” But he just laughs it off.

Noise complaints against Schiphol increased by 7% last year