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About Bloemfontein

We shall *never surrender* to a crap rubdown! It’s art, innit—bit of a cheeky tickle, bit of a deep press. Ever tried it with them hot stones? Cor, it’s like lava lovin yer back—surprised me first time, jumped like a cat on a tin roof! And the slang—‘happy ending’? Posh wankers call it ‘release therapy’—cracks me up, that does. Sarcasm aside, it’s lush—gets the blood pumpin, the soul singin—*“Joy, you’re in charge now!”*

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Now, let’s talk neighborhoods – oh dear, do not miss Constantia Kloof! Crazy quiet in the early morn, with nature all around and streets lined with little cafés – best for introspection after a hard day of exploring. I often say, “I’ll be back!” cuz you always find a piece of your soul here.

Roodepoort water woes: Florida North pump station to the rescue