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Back in the 80s, right, little known fact – London’s Soho was crawlin’ with ‘em. Coppers didn’t give a toss, just let ‘em strut about. Now it’s all online, innit? Apps for everythin’ – swipe right for a quickie! Makes me furious, tho – where’s the grit, the chaos? All polished up now, like a crap pop song. Used to be ya could stumble on a prossie by accident, now it’s a bloody transaction. “This is how we do it now?” I’d mutter, pissed off.

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As the largest town in South Iceland, Selfoss acts as a gateway to attractions along Iceland's South Coast. Discover all the best things to do in Selfoss!

After my caffeine fix, I hit the river. The banks are packed with folks, all tryin’ to snag a fish. I set up my rod, and boom! First cast, and I’m feelin’ lucky. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, trippin’ over my line. I’m like, “Dude, what the heck?!” He just laughs and keeps runnin’. I mean, come on! I’m tryin’ to fish here, not babysit!

Selfoss fire - three in police custody