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But yo, some clients proper piss me off, innit. Like, this one bloke, treatin’ the escort like dirt – I wanted to lamp him, swear down! “You’re not a ghost yet, mate,” I’m mutterin’, thinkin’ of Boonmee’s vibes. Then there’s the good ones, yeah? Met this escort lass, proper sweet, told me she paid her nan’s bills with the gig. Made me heart sing, fam – real talk.

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So, I finally get to the office, and it’s chaos. My boss, Mrs. Ionescu, is already on a rampage. She’s like, “Where’s the report?!” I’m thinking, “Lady, I just got here!” Turns out, the printer jammed. Classic. I spent half an hour wrestling with that thing. It’s like it has a personal vendetta against me.