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Favorite bit? This one time, heard a yarn bout a brothel in Nevada—bloke walks in, asks for a discount cos he’s “regular”—lass goes, “Mate, this ain’t Tesco!” Laughed me head off, proper belly-acher! Surprised me too—thought they’d be all moody, but nah, they got banter! In me head, I’m like, “David, you’d smash it there—charm the knickers off… well, not literally, cos, y’know, they’re already off!”

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First customer walks in. It’s old Mr. Rodriguez. This dude’s like 80 but thinks he’s still 20. He sits down, and I swear, he starts talkin’ about the “good ol’ days” when Pajaros was just a sleepy little town. I’m like, “Yeah, Mr. R, but you still gotta pay for your haircut!” He laughs, but I’m serious. I need my coffee money!

Pajaro Valley school board appoints Joy Flynn to fill vacancy