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Little known fact, right? Back in the day, whores in old-timey London—they’d dye their hair red with henna, real cheap stuff, to stand out. This one? Bet she’s got some wild dye job too, probly somethin’ tacky like neon pink. Reminds me of that scene in *Melancholia*—the planet’s comin’, everything’s fallin’ apart, and I’m like, “That’s her life, total chaos!” She’s a walkin’ disaster, but damn, she owns it.

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Later, I met up with my buddy at the park near the harbor. We were just chillin’, talkin’ about life, you know? Then outta nowhere, this group of kids starts playin’ soccer. They’re kickin’ the ball around, laughin’, havin’ a blast. I’m feelin’ all nostalgic, so I jump in. I haven’t played in ages! But man, I’m rusty. I trip over my own feet and faceplant in the sand. Everyone’s laughin’ at me, and I’m just like, “Yeah, I meant to do that.”

Maldives marks 70th National Day